How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
