Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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