and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
