Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
