also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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