Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
do nipples grow back?
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