school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
