And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
