can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
