I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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