oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
