you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Randomize
