Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
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