No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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