called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize
