I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
This baby is an asshole
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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