I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
she woke up with a sticky ear
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
