I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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