No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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