Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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