You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
