Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
where are my eyebrows?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize