After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
