That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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