I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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