I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
