I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
