Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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