just tell him i said nine months
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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