I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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