I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
50% drunk capacity currently
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize