She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize