we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
