Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize