I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
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