I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
