Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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