38 yer olds are good kisserssss
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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