oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
bring money and cleavage
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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