She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
