chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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