They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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