my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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