I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
