I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Randomize
