I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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