a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize