i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Holy sore nipples Batman
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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