thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
