halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
