to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
All the doctor said was why
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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